How do i cope with my parents splitting up?

[Taste of Britain]

Fuck knows what to say :|


HELP

[Puppy Dogs and Ice Cream]

damn thats messed up and a hard situation to deal with and had been through it when i was young. it hurts alot and is confusing but sometimes its for the best cause if there unhappy together eventually you would find that it would affect you more. also sometimes its a temporary things . before my parents died they seemed to split every few years and get back together.. there wouldbe lots of good times when they got along but when they got unhappy it seemed as tho i would suffer also. time usually makes most things better and when they were apart i tried to spend equal time with both and actually tried to help them with there issues which took my mind off of what i was feeling.

then eventually i would realize that it was for the best and it actually had its perks.
2 christmases 2 birthdays and such.

in the long run time does heal all wounds and like i said i know it can be confusing and painful even but the best thing to do is to try and understand things from there point of view and think whether it would affect you if they were together and unhappy.also talking to them about it does help alittle and sometimes gives you understanding about what they are feeling and whats on there minds

[Jacx]

got to agree with tung with a lot of that...them staying together (how they love to say for the sake of the kids) is actually worse most of the time, they end up sniping and feeling repressed being forced to live together.

Lissen the advantage of them splitting is they get some space to breath and time to think. For all u know in time they can heal and become stronger as friends and maybe get back together again... thats of course if they can keep their minds open!

Reagrdless all u can do is be there, support them both and be respectfull of the situation they are in.

I dont know the situation of their breakup, so its kind of hard to comment, we could all give advice but people are induviduals so there is no 1 answer to a situation like this, we can suggest, we can comment, but only they can work out whats gonna be right and wrong in this.

When my parents split up it was bitter sweet, i had a bad relationship with my father, lots of beatings and also bad treatment ...physical abuse of my mom and sis, made me a angry mofo and i hated him. But the day they split...i still cried (i don't cry easy) because regardless of all of that, he was part of me.

Talk with em, understand their reasons, becuase understanding them and their reasons will help u understand ur own feelings!

[JaiJai]

ToB,

Sorry to hear your parents are splitting up. It's never an easy thing, no matter what the issues are with them, because kids expect and vision their parents being together forever.

I was in my mid 20's when my mom and dad split up, they were married for about 25 years when they split up. It was a hard situation because they both wanted us kids to be on their "side", which I refused to do, I stayed totally neutral, I had to.. I didn't want to choose. My brother and sister kinda sided with mom though, which was hard for my dad. To this day my dad and sister barely talk.. he resents how she turned against him during the divorce.

I don't know the reasons your parents are splitting up, but as John said, give them time, they may work it out, and they may not. But above all, I recommend staying neutral in it, unless there's bonafide reason to choose sides, such as abuse etc..

They are our parents, so it's hard to stay impartial. But they are also 2 individuals in a relationship and they may have problems even you aren't aware of. My whole life i never heard my parents argue, so it was a complete shock when they split up. However they had problems that even us kids didn't realize. They stayed together for "the kids sake", which I almost wish they'd have split when I was little..it was hard to handle after them being together all my life to age 25.

Anyways.. good luck.. and if u need to talk, hit me up on MSN
You'll get through it.. I promise you will
:Friends:

[Taste of Britain]

i dunno if concrete yet but looks that way :(

cheers guys (Y)

[Puppy Dogs and Ice Cream]

well if it ever really gets to ya and you need people to talk to we are here for ya richy

[Smash Bros]

i was 11 when my mum and dad split up. i guess i was saved all the pain of it though as a few months later my dad died in a motor bike crash (completly different sort of pain)

but fuck if you need someone to chat too there are heaps of people on here that will talk to you about it all. even if no one is online use pm.

or if you dont want to share what your feeling just write it all down so it is out in the open. you dont have tyo show anyone if you dont want to but that does help heaps. ive used it before when i was depressed and felt like suicide. obviously i won that one :D

[ruffnready]

if everything goes wrong m8,remember there both still there,dont blame one or the other,you can still love both your own way,they maybe split up,and whoever you feel you`d like to stay with,because it`l happen,you`l go through the phase of that,you need never worry,they`l both be there for you,always when you need them they`l be there,lets hope things work out and your saved all the heartache bud,,good luck,,ruff

[Taste of Britain]

thanks everyone :)


(yn) might be ok :)